ZAK SABBATH AND MANDY MORBID: PORN STARS IN A RELATIONSHIP


If you’re one of those people who can manage not to act like an idiot just because everyone around you is, porn’s a pretty good job. Hot girls have sex with us; then sometimes someone films it and we all get paid.

Mandy is kind of a tattoo snob—she has almost everything done by Josh Lord of East Side Ink in New York. His specialty is doing mind-bendingly precise copies of artwork, which is good because a lot of what Mandy gets tattooed is stuff I drew, and my stuff can get dense and complicated. Being a professional artist is my day job.

I’m not even remotely a tattoo snob. I have a few by Josh and a gorgeous one by Kaza copy of an old Yoshitoshi print—but my whole right arm is pretty much amateur hour. It’s all apprentices or people practicing. Mandy has a genetic condition—Ehlers-Danlos syndrome—and a whole raft of related chronic illnesses, and I have them tattooed on my inner forearm. A friend did it. It was one of her first tattoos, and it doesn’t look slick at all, but it does the trick when I have to go to the emergency room and fill out forms.

The tattoos do their job, even when they’re bad. If hot tattooed chicks in porn want to have sex with you, you have to have the right tattoos—even if that means one or two of the old ones from back in the day that are blown out or a little wiggly.